Nobody wants to be that tourist; the one talking loudly on a quiet train or chasing down a geisha for a photo. Japan is an amazing place to visit, but it comes with its own set of manners and customs that might feel unfamiliar at first. That’s why we put together this guide: to help you avoid common mistakes and enjoy your trip without the awkward “oops” moments.
Traveling in Japan can feel a little intimidating at first because there are so many unspoken rules and customs. The good news? Most of them are easy to follow once you know what to look for. Japan is a country that really values being considerate of others, and even small things (like how you line up for a train or where you eat a snack) can make a difference.
The best advice we can give is to “read the room.” If everyone else is quiet, be quiet. If you notice people taking their shoes off, do the same. Just pausing for a second to see what others are doing will get you pretty far.
And don’t worry you will make mistakes. We definitely have. Sometimes a local might politely let you know if you’ve done something a little rude, but that’s okay. A quick “sumimasen” (sorry/excuse me) and a smile is usually all it takes. What matters most is showing that you’re trying.
- Politeness in language: Bowing is a normal greeting. Saying “arigatou gozaimasu, ありがとうございます” (thank you) and “sumimasen” (excuse me/sorry, すみません) goes a long way.
- Read the room: Social harmony (wa,は) is valued. Pay attention to what others are doing and adjust your behavior accordingly.
- “Shoganai (しょうがない)/ Shikata ga nai (仕方がない)” (I can’t help it/ It can’t be helped): This phrase captures a cultural tendency to accept inconveniences gracefully without complaint. We experienced this for the first time a few months ago when our departing plane from Narita was delayed and we were going to miss our connecting flight. Jacob went up to the counter to see what could be done and was simply told Shoganai.
- No eating/drinking while walking: Street food is meant to be eaten at the stall or a designated area. Walking while eating is seen as messy or inconsiderate. There are some exceptions like at festivals but for most instances assume you should not eat and walk.
- Forming a line: Japanese people naturally queue for everything; trains, buses, restaurants, shops, and even elevators. Cutting in line is considered very rude.
- Trash disposal: Public bins are rare. Carry your trash until you find the correct recycling bins (often at convenience stores or train stations). We would keep an extra plastic bag from our late night konbini trips in our backpacks to use as a trash bag.
- Shoes off indoors: Always remove shoes when entering homes, certain restaurants, temples, and traditional inns. Slippers are usually provided. To go above and beyond make sure you place them neatly in the designated area.
- Gift-giving: Small souvenirs (omiyage, おみやげ) are expected if visiting someone or returning from a trip. Presentation and packaging matter. This may not apply to you if you are not visiting friends in Japan but it is nice to know if you do end up making a friend or two on your travels.
- Cash is king: Credit cards are increasingly accepted, but cash is still common. Always carry some yen.
Below we have listed some specific situations you may experience that can have some strange rules to most western travelers.
- Quiet is expected: Avoid talking loudly, playing music, or taking phone calls. “Read the room”; if everyone else is silent, follow suit. If you need to take a phone call, exit the train at the next stop.
- Priority seating: Always give up your seat for the elderly, pregnant passengers, people with disabilities, or parents with small children.
Women-only cars: During rush hour, many train lines have women-only cars for safety and comfort. Look for pink signs on the platform. - Forming lines: People queue neatly where train doors will open, and boarding is done in an orderly manner. Cutting in line is frowned upon. Look for signs on the ground for where you should stand.
- Don’t block the doors: Step aside to let passengers off before boarding.
- No eating/drinking: Exceptions exist on long-distance trains (Shinkansen, express trains), but not on subways or local trains. A good rule: if you’re facing forward in a seat, you can usually eat/drink; if you’re facing inward, don’t.
- Backpacks & bags: Take backpacks off and hold them in front of you in crowded trains.
- Paying: At many places, you pay at the register, not at the table. Split bills are uncommon; one person usually pays, then you settle up later.
- Getting attention: It’s normal (and not rude) to call out “Sumimasen!” to flag a waiter. Some restaurants have buzzers at the table.
- Buttons & tablets: Many chain restaurants have ordering buttons, touchscreens, or ticket vending machines; check how to order before sitting down.
- Ordering food: Don’t order more than you can eat. Leaving food is considered wasteful and impolite.
- Chopstick etiquette: Don’t stick chopsticks upright in rice (it resembles funeral rites). Don’t pass food directly from chopstick to chopstick.
- Sharing dishes: If sharing, use the opposite end of your chopsticks to take food from communal plates.
- Slurping: It’s acceptable (and even polite) to slurp noodles like ramen or soba.
- No photos of geisha/maiko without permission: In Gion, it’s actually banned to take photos of geisha or maiko on private streets. We’ve all seen the viral video of someone chasing a geisha for a picture; don’t be that tourist. Many are working, not posing for tourists. Respect their privacy.
- Stay on public paths: Don’t wander into private alleyways or behind “no entry” signs. Many old machiya (townhouses) look like shops but are private homes.
- Don’t touch kimono or hairpieces: Even if you see a geisha or maiko up close, avoid trying to touch or stop them.
- Be quiet and respectful at tea houses: Many ochaya (tea houses) are exclusive, private establishments. Avoid peeking inside or interrupting.
- Temple & shrine etiquette:
- Wash hands at the purification fountain before entering.
- Don’t walk in the middle of shrine pathways (reserved for deities).
- Photography may be restricted inside temple buildings; always check. (Check out my photography packing list for more etiquette tips here!)
- No food inside temple grounds: Eating and drinking while walking in historic districts is especially frowned upon.
- Respect seasonal events: During cherry blossom season (hanami), don’t claim large picnic spots unless you’re actually using them, and clean up after yourself.
- Don’t block narrow streets: In places like Arashiyama’s bamboo grove or Gion’s alleyways, step aside if you’re taking photos so others can pass.
- Bicycle awareness: Kyoto especially has lots of cyclists; don’t walk in bike lanes and watch for bells as a warning.
- Kimono rental etiquette: If you rent a kimono, treat it respectfully. Don’t smoke or eat messy street food while wearing it.
- Respect gardens: Don’t step into raked sand/stone gardens or touch moss; many are centuries old and delicate.
- Festival manners: If you attend a matsuri (festival), don’t push into crowds. Watch how locals line up for food stalls or procession viewing.
When traveling abroad (especially as an American these days), it can sometimes feel like you’re under a microscope. Even with plenty of research, you’ll still make mistakes, and that’s okay. Katlyn once blocked a narrow pathway. Jacob has been loud on the train. We’ve both worn our backpacks on crowded trains (and felt so embarrassed when we realized). The important part is to acknowledge it, apologize, and move on. It will be okay, we promise!
また後で!
Jacob and Katlyn